It's New Year's Resolution season and while everyone else is struggling to get through the fourth day of eating health and not getting mashed up, Radio Slave has revealed his resolution to help out amateur DJs.

Taking to Facebook, Radio Slave AKA Matt Edwards, wrote a handy how-to guide, specially tailed for shiftless wannabe DJs with deep pockets. The guide covers all the DJ essentials; from learning social media to manipulating friendships, paying ghost producers to buying edgy clothes.

Reaction to the message has been mixed. Most people reckon he has a point, with some going as far as to thank him for speaking up, but it looks like not everyone appreciated the guide with a lot of people accusing him of being bitter or asking him why he was wasting his time. Either way the conflicting nature of the post got him some pretty decent engagement, so it seems Mr. Slave knows a thing or two about social media himself... no wonder he's such a good DJ...

 

You can read the guide in full below and check out the original post (and comment section) here.

 

"My New Year message and guide to becoming a professional DJ in 2018...

1.

First make sure you’re a really good liar. This is imperative and there’s no point continuing if you can’t lie.

Move to Berlin or any major northern European city.

Befriend a well known DJ, Club Promoter or record shop owner. It’s not what you know its who you know.

Ask which trends are big in dance music.

Find an underground producer through your new friends (unknown is better ) and pay him/her to create an EP thats fits in with the current trends.

Also make sure you pay the producer enough money to keep his/her mouth shut or make sure they sign an NDA (non disclosure agreement).

Approach a cool and credible record label that still produces vinyl (the black round discs your parents had) via your DJ/Promoter/Record shop owner friend.

And please note there is no need to DJ at this point. It’s NOT important.

2.

Study Social media.

This will be the key to your success so channel 100% of your energy into Instagram and Facebook.

You’ve got your ghost producer making your tracks, and you can access all the musical information you need to impress people via youtube, Discogs and Beatport so please remember there’s no need to waste any time digging for records or learning to DJ as a craft or working your way through the ranks. 
This is an illusion you’ll create later with well placed photos of you outside a record store or a cool selfie in front of some modular gear (at a music store or studio).

So exploit Social Media and make this your best friend and biggest weapon.

Research all the current and biggest music news sites.
Check which new artists they championed over the last few years and see if you fit the bill. 
Of course this will also depend on who’s made it and who’s not. No point in trying to copy some loser.

And then find your look:

Will you be nerdy ? 
Will you need a weird, edgy name ?
Check all the best fashion / streetwear blogs and see whats hot.

Image is everything !

4.

You’ve managed to convince a credible label to release your music (this will require a good amount of lies).

At this point you’ll need to start spending some money (but not on music) and you should find a PR agency or agent that will represent you and so look at the smaller agencies as they might take you on because you’re young, edgy and fashionable and for a cheap rate.

Then once you start to get a name you can dump them and go with a big agency that represents larger and more commercial DJ/artists which will enable you get a bigger profile.

5.

The record label has mastered your EP and is starting to promote your release.
The magazines are interested because you’re fresh, new and you have a fashionable image,
And securing a feature is key to getting gigs and moving forward.

Also at this point you’ll need to beg the label for some shows or ask your new network of friends to secure a gig.

NOTE. Don’t get to close to the first group of friends. You’ll dump these as you move up the social ladder.

6.

Preparing for your first show.
Join this group on Facebook: The Identification of Music Group

Check your/friends favourite DJ’s. See what tracks they’re playing and make some notes on which tracks are hot.

You can also check tracks on Youtube, Discogs etc (if you’re into music) but it’s probably best you use your time on Facebook and Instagram.

Ask your DJ / label friends / PR guys for music / tracks.

At this stage everyone is totally behind you and willing to do whatever it is to make you a success.
They want you to succeed. It’s a great look for them and it generally makes people feel good if they see people doing well (or does it ?).

So make the most of everyone involved and find someone to give you some DJ lessons.
Ask them to show you how to use Rekordbox.

Buy two 32G USB sticks and load them with the tracks.

And remember to only use the SYNC function on the CDJs.

Or another more devious option (which I’ve seen) is to record all the tracks at the same tempo on CDs and use these to give the illusion that you’re a real DJ. But this requires more time away from social media.

7.

You’re almost there.
The magazine features are coming out. You’re getting a few shows through that cool independent record label and you’re social media stats are growing.

And whats next ?

You dump the first record label and go to a bigger one. You dump the first PR company, and by this stage you’re probably on your second DJ agent.

You’re recording the confetti moments of your gigs on video and everyone thinks you’re cool.

And if it’s all going well the management companies will be circling like hawks.
They’ll see an opportunity to make money and take you to the next level….

….and within one year you can go from zero to playing at all the best and most credible clubs and festivals around the world.

Happy New Year and good luck !

x" - Radio Slave